I am sure I'm not the only mom who does this. (I hope I am not the only mom that does this). I constantly think of all of the things that can go wrong. As my baby climbs the ladder on the wooden play set out back I imagine him falling. I picture exactly how he would fall and look at each and every place he will hit his head on the way down. In a split second I look around to see how fast I can get to him and scoop him up, where I will run to take him and who I can yell to for help. I do this all of the time. And it drives me crazy. And I blame this crazy behavior for other crazy behavior...like my constant yelling.
All of this "imagining" makes me crazy and makes me yell, constantly. Usually I'm yelling things like "are you freaking kidding me?", "Stop" and "do you think that is a good idea?". Mostly "Stop" followed by "I'm finished with you", "go to your room" or "you will be grounded".
The ONLY way to stop these irrational thoughts is to be accompanied by my mom. Sometimes I think she is like a cure to the sickness, she has the irrational thoughts for me. I can take a step back and realize how crazy it is, even role my eyes and make fun of her (like I'm sure my husband and bystanders do of me). But then after she is gone, I have time to think about her concerns and my crazy grows worse.
I'm sharing this on this Easter Monday because while I worry, constantly (and my mom worries constantly) I have also been quietly reflecting on Mary our Mother, Jesus' Mother and been thinking of all of the worry and emotions she must have felt as the mother of our Savior. As I worry that my boys are going to fall on recess when I am not there she was walking with her Son as he fell three times on the way to Calvary. As I think through every precaution and reaction I will perform to protect my babies from any harm Mary watched as her only Son was beaten, mocked, stripped, nailed and hung from a cross like a criminal. Mary watched as her Son died and was buried, she then suffered worrying and waiting for the outcome He had promised. Mary's Son, suffered, died, was buried, descended into hell and opened the gates of heaven. Mary knew this would happen, she new that as He promised, it would be but I can't help but imagine the worry and sadness in the process.
As my boys become young men of Christ I know that their road won't always be easy. They will fall and get-up, be pushed back and move forward. However, I have to have faith that our Lord will keep them safe (and "free me from all anxiety"?). While God "gave His only begotten Son" to save man from himself, I think he gave Mary to us mommies as an example for raising our sons.
So, go tell John, Jesus has Risen! what was all of that worrying about?
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